Transaction Networking

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I was discussing networking with a client and I told him to stop networking.  Well, I told him to stop networking ineffectively.  He thought, like most job seekers, that he should go to job fairs and job seekers networking events.  I told him: “You didn’t go to those events when you were employed, then why are you doing it now?  Unemployed go to those events, not people who have jobs.  How will you ever find employed people there?”

In fact, most people when they network, approach it like an emotional transaction, as if they were a consumer shopping for groceries.  They trade business cards like they were reward points – and it never gets them anywhere.  Even worse, if they think you’re a job seeker, they tell you about their website and they feel satisfied as if they helped.  In their mind the transaction is finished, complete and they are glad they helped.  This is transaction networking, and I strongly advise my clients not engage in it.

The problem with transactions is you get a transaction in the form of a business card and a website, but you don’t get any real help, and you most certainly don’t get a job.  This only leads to frustration.

Instead, I tell them about the book ‘The Giving Tree’ by Shel Silverstein.  I tell them that there are others that network like the giving tree, and look for others who understand the importance of giving generously, without reservation and without expectation.  These are not transactional people – they expect that others will ‘play the same way’ and be focusing on reciprocating.  They believe that if everyone focuses on giving to others in their network then their needs will be taken care of in due time.

Of course, this requires an understanding of generosity, and those who don’t ‘get it’ (evidenced by their refusal to generously help) usually don’t continue to receive help.  I tell my clients that once they connect with giving tree groups of people who network by giving –  it’s best to wait until asked ‘how can I help you?’

After you make your request (framed in the context of ‘help me help others – this company, this team, this leader’), be sure to stay in relationship and continue to give.

This approach will lead to lifetime connections and relationships that grow into business success.

Career Expert

The Career Expert is a highly sought after business and career coach. His perspective and advice is sought after by career changers, employees and executives across the U.S.

Article Tags:career, Career Expert, job seekers, networking